April Fools (Or Not)

I picked up a copy of Willamette Week Wednesday, and in the "news" section: What to do this week in arts and culture -- Came across this blurb. "Willy Week" presented this as a regular featured article under "what to do". It's amazing. Two reasons: WW presents this as a regular news and this guy actually convinces people to pay him for looking at them.
   It's not April 1, but I thought this was a joke.  If it's not 4-1, then WW must be channeling  The Onion. Alas, it isn't so. The page is WW being "non-critical".
   (In full disclosure -- WW seems to feel that's important -- I stared at his picture for awhile.  -- According to Braco's web site this should work -- And my knee is still crap.  And my stents didn't spring from my chest like a lot of useless junk -- I've got doubts about how good at healing he is) 
  But look at him. At his sad brown eyes and soft gentle (smirking) smile that seems to say: "I got you to pay me $100 to look at you, and I bet I can do it again."
   WW pretends to be a legitimate newspaper  but it publishes crap like this as real news.
   But I thought: This is a GREAT scam. This guy doesn't actually talk to the public or press. (He probably sounds like a chipmunk on helium) while I have a fine mellifluous bass-baritone so I can actually talk. -- But all I would really need to do is sit and stare at my suckers clients.   I can do this. 

      Are you healed? (That's only $75 -- My special first time rate) Braco is a bit more gentle than I am.  He looks like "Lets all get together, sing Kum-By-Ah, and get well and feel good."  I seem to have a look of: "HEAL, DAMN YOU!" But I think that should work. 
   I've been looking for work that I'm willing to do, (A VERY limited range) and I think this fits the bill. I will definitely pay taxes and social security and everything else on every penny I earn.  DA